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Meeting men

Most cities and larger towns have specific gay bars or gay saunas where men can meet other men. These places traditionally were hard to find but are becomming more main-stream and visible. In Manchester we're very fortunate to have a thriving and famous "Gay Village" but even smaller places will have somewhere tucked away. Contacting the local Gay and Lesbian Switchboard or looking in magazines such as Gay Times can help find interesting places.

 

If your unfamiliar with the gay scene you may be uncomfortable visiting such places for the first time. Obviously there is always the small chance that you might be spotted by someone, so you need to weigh up the risk for yourself. It my be advisable to make contact with a group such as ourselves and arrange to meet somewhere away from the gay venues first.

 

The Internet is also a very useful way of getting more information about services for married men, and sometimes enables you to talk to other men online. But dont forget that all personal computers keep a record of which sites are accessed, so NEVER use a machine that someone else can monitor, for example at work. Alternatives may be to use a smartphone or internet cafe.

 

Telephone chat services are another way of making contact with other men. However, these services can be very costly, and premium rate numbers do appear on telephone bills. The gay press, and some regular papers have details of chat-lines in their personals section.

 

Personal ads in publications such as "Gay Times" and "Attitude" are another popular way of meeting up with other men. This isn’t always suitable for men who can’t receive mail at home, but some of the telephone services have a ‘voice-mail’ system which can get round this problem.

 

Certain lay-bys, parks and toilets throughout the country are places where men go to pick up other men, known as "Cottaging". This may be quick and anonymous, but it is potentially very risky. The Police visit these areas to deter site users, or to arrest them, since sex in public places is almost always illegal. There is also the risk of physical assault or robbery as these spots are by their nature secluded and attract those with ill intent.

 

 

 

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